Who is my grandmother after all? And who am I?

Xuefeng

"If one contemplates the heavens and earth incessantly, profound principles will eventually become clear."

"Let's leave it to fate."

These are two phrases that my grandmother often said when telling fairy tales.

Contemplate the heavens and earth? How does one "contemplate"?

Profound principles? What are these "profound principles"?

Fate? What does "fate" mean?

I, this ignorant and foolish grandson, why didn't I ask my grandmother about these questions in the first place? It wasn't until more than twenty years after her departure that I remembered to inquire about these matters.

I have asked the sun, moon, stars, inquired about the mountains and rivers, questioned the gods, Buddhas, and immortals, and even inquired about the winds, clouds, rain, and snow. The answer I received was: mystery.

I have no choice but to trace back to my grandmother and suddenly realize that this grandmother of mine is extraordinary.

1. Grandma was illiterate, yet she knew countless fairy tales and could speak eloquently, presenting one set of principles after another. This left my highly educated uncle and other learned individuals with no opportunity to interject, but instead compelled them to listen attentively.

2. Grandma's cleanliness and tidiness were renowned. Her cleanliness was not only reflected in her immaculate attire and perfectly arranged hair, but also in the spotless and bright tables, chairs, and benches, as well as the orderly interior decor. It was further evident in the often-overlooked dark corners that most people easily neglect, such as under the table and cabinet, in the corners of the walls, behind the door and under the food steamer, and inside the bucket next to the stove, where cleanliness surpassed even the external appearance.

3. In my memory, Grandma never went to burn incense or worship Buddha, yet she strictly abstained from meat. Not only did she refrain from eating beef, mutton, chicken, duck, or fish, but she also never even tasted eggs, involving any of these.

4. One summer during the harvest season, while Grandma was cutting wheat, a wheat awn got stuck in her throat. As my uncle and father recounted, Grandma immediately threw down the sickle, stood up, and said, "Whether you continue harvesting this wheat is your business. I will never engage in farming again." The next day, she rented a storefront in the county town and opened a "Zhang Family Steamed Bread Shop." Within a year, this "Zhang Family Steamed Bread Shop" became renowned far and wide.

5. When my father was young, during an argument with Grandma, he wanted to show her "a little lesson." He took a pig-killing knife and a rope, stabbed his own ankle bone and tendons, then looped the rope through and hung himself upside down on a forked tree branch in the courtyard. If such a scene had occurred with an ordinary mother, she would have been terrified, at the very least shouting and screaming. However, my grandmother, witnessing her son's foolish act, calmly and disdainfully pointed at her own neck and said, "Son, stabbing your ankle is nothing remarkable. If you want to stab, stab here next time." After saying this, she completely disregarded her own son hanging upside down on the tree as if nothing had happened and walked away. My father, watching Grandma's receding figure, was completely conquered. Instead of giving Grandma "a little lesson," she ended up giving him "a little lesson."

My mother held great respect for Grandma and often exclaimed to me, "If your grandmother were a man, she would pierce a hole through the sky!"

It is vulgar and intolerable to simply describe the extraordinary and unconventional actions of my grandmother. How could she, an illiterate peasant woman, possess knowledge of so many fairy tales? Why would a person who does not burn incense or worship Buddha abstain from meat? In the ever-changing weather of the scorching summer, when the golden ripe wheat must be urgently harvested, why would my grandmother, just because of a minor incident of a wheat awn getting stuck in her throat, angrily abandon farming without hesitation? When her own son pierced himself and hung upside down from a tree, why didn't the mother feel any distress and simply walked away as if nothing had happened?

It's a mystery.

I remember my grandmother telling me (I was in the fifth grade at the time), "Let me tell you about the origins of our family. Take some time to write it down."

But being ignorant and playful, I didn't take it to heart and casually replied, "Grandma, let's talk about it later." Little did I know, shortly after, my grandmother passed away.

Opportunities once missed may never come again. One misstep became an eternal regret, I lost my roots.

As a lost individual without roots, I'm like a drifting duckweed, aimlessly floating on the vast sea, carried by the currents without a sense of direction. I don't know where I came from or where I'm heading.

While reading the Bible, it suddenly dawned on me that everything my grandmother did was for my sake.

Before Jesus came to Earth, Heaven sent John as a precursor to prepare the way for Him.

Before I came to this world, the Kingdom of Heaven sent my "grandmother" to enlighten and guide me, who was about to be born.

So, who is my grandmother after all? And who am I?

Countless sleepless nights of realizations and the wonders of nature have led me to contemplate the profound principles and discover my own roots. I have come to understand why the Greatest Creator has laid down the Thirty-Six Eight-diagram Arrays in the universe and have unraveled the mysteries of deciphering these "Eight-diagram Arrays."

Oh, the Greatest Creator! Your love for me is immeasurable, and even if I had billions of years, it would be difficult to repay.